Super Bowl Sunday is upon us.
For some of us, this warrants little more than a half-hearted shrug of the shoulders. I’ll watch the game but except for those very rare occasions when the Bears are in it, I’m not generally riveted to the television screen.
But for gamblers and gambling establishments, this is a bigger holiday than Christmas.
There are so many things you can place wagers on, aside from just the outcome of the game. You can bet on the television broadcast, commercials, halftime show, national anthem, weather. There’s all sorts of crazy stuff. There even are bets being offered by various Las Vegas establishments pertaining to President Donald Trump.
Of all the prop bets, this is maybe the dumbest one we’ve seen: Odds that the opening coin toss comes up heads: 1-to-1.
Oddly, no one is offering a bet on the odds of it coming up tails. We’re betting it also is 1-to-1.
Some of the other bizarre ones we’ve seen:
Odds on what color Gatorade will be poured on the winning coach. Orange and blue are the co-favorites at 3-to-1, followed by clear at 5-to-1 and purple and yellow at 7-to-1. (Wait a minute, they make clear Gatorade? Isn’t that called water?)
Odds that the goal posts fall down during the game: 5000-to-1.
Odds that someone catches fire during the halftime show: 25-to-1.
Odds of it snowing in Minneapolis during the game: 2-to-3.
Odds of there being a locust attack in Minneapolis during the game: 1,000,000-to-1.
Over-and-under on the number of tweets from Trump during the game: 3.5.
Over-and-under on the length of Pink’s rendition of the national anthem: 1 minute, 58 seconds.
Over-and-under on the number of times the phrase "Dilly-Dilly” is uttered in all Bud Light Super Bowl commercials combined: 15.5.
Odds that Tom Brady retires after the game: 49-to-1.
Odds that Patriots coach Bill Belichick retires after the game: 5-to-2.
Odds that Eagles coach Doug Pederson is fired after the game: 999-to-1.
Odds that an Eagles fan runs onto the field during the game: 50-to-1.
Odds that an Eagles fan throws debris onto the field during the game: 33-to-1.
Over-and-under on the number of Eagles fans arrested before the game even begins: 1.5.
Here is a prop bet that the folks in Vegas missed: Odds that an Eagles fan punches out a horse.
Actually, it’s already happened.
In a scene that must have been vaguely reminiscent of Alex Karras’ Mongo character in Blazing Saddles, a 19-year-old man allegedly punched both a mounted Pennsylvania state police officer and his horse prior to the Eagles’ NFC championship game victory over the Vikings.
He was charged with aggravated and simple assault, reckless endangering and assorted other things. We’re assuming one of them was cruelty to animals.
There will be at least one very ardent Eagles fan watching the game closely from eastern Iowa.
Hawkeye basketball coach Fran McCaffery grew up in Philadelphia and served as an usher at Eagles home games while he was in high school.
“Basically, I just wanted to go to the games and didn’t have a lot of money to buy the tickets so I’d go down and they’d pay me $10 to show people to their seats, then I got to watch the game,’’ McCaffery said.
The Eagles actually got to the big game in one of those years under head coach Dick Vermeil, losing to Oakland 27-10 in Super Bowl XV. McCaffery has fond memories of watching Wilbert Montgomery, Harold Carmichael and Ron Jaworski perform heroics in old Veterans Stadium.
He said this is finally their year.
“They’re going to win,’’ he said. “No question about it.''
The Cleveland Indians announced last week that they finally will succumb to pressure from native American activists and get rid of that iconic Chief Wahoo logo the franchise has used for decades.
They’re not doing it right away, which would seem easy enough to do. They’ll get rid of the chief in 2019.
That means all those Indians fans who love the traditional logo have one last chance — an entire season actually — to buy up Wahoo hats, t-shirts, sweatshirts, sweatpants, jackets, blankets, bobbleheads and assorted other items. Then, in 2019, those fans will be encouraged to go out and buy the new, politically correct, Wahoo-free apparel.
Does this smell like a marketing ploy to anyone else? It looks like the classic case of a pro sports franchise doing the right thing for the wrong reason.